Happiness is not a matter of intensity but of balance, order, rhythm and harmony. ~ Thomas Merton

Friday, June 19, 2009

Looking Back, Thinking Forward

For the last month or so, I've been haunted by Moose. No, not the large antlered herbivore that inhabits the frosty northern regions. My big chestnut Thoroughbred with the tiny ears. I lost him to colic in 2003 after owning him for just 14 months. Back in May I had a dream that God gave him back to me. Silly, I know. But you know those dreams that seem to cross the line into reality? This was one. And when reality crashed back in, it was like loosing him all over again.

Horses seem to blur the line between "pet" and "family member." I'm not one for treating our four-legged companions like human family. I firmly believe it is right and proper for cats and dogs and horses to be treated first as cats and dogs and horses. Anthropomorphism is a dangerous game and it eventually leads to unbalance both for the human and the animal.

But horses touch the heart and stir the soul in such a way that goes beyond just a pet or a companion. A few years ago I read She Flies Without Wings by Mary D. Midkiff. This book captured exactly how I feel about horses and the effect they have on me - body and soul.
Moose opened a world to me that I may never have known. He was a troubled horse with little trust and a lot of insecurities. In him I found a love and appreciation for horses that went beyond my childhood longings for a "pony to ride." Moose gave me my first opportunity to experience the power of the bond between horse and human.

I still grieve for him. I am finally coming to terms with loosing him and moving on with Cricket. I need to realize that all my success with Cricket is thanks to Moose.


Tina said...

The first horse that really touched my soul had to be euthanized 13 months after I got him. he haunted my dreams for years, and it wasn't until I got Dixie that he finally went away. I'm thinking that that means she's supposed to be my next horse, although after out most recent accident and hospitalization, I'm not so sure!

Lisa said...

I bought Cricket only 2 weeks after loosing Moose. Guilt haunted me for years. Only recently have I really come to terms with loosing my TB and then finding Cricket.