I have been struggling over the past few days. I'm not sure where the funk originated and I cannot really find the grounds for feeling so lousy. Things are going well. Better than they have in ages. So why the doldrums? I decided I needed a change in perspective. One that lifted me about 4' off the ground and looked out between my horse's ears.
Last night I had my first ride on Cricket at the farm. Nothing earth-shattering. Nothing that's going to set the world on fire. But fore me, it was simply amazing. Simple and amazing.
Etruska became very stressed when I took Cricket out of view so instead of my original plan to explore down the road, I decided to follow the fence line to the back of the property, allowing Etruska to walk along side of us.
I had Cricket tacked up in a bareback pad and I just tied my lead line into reins. We headed off on our little adventure. I had no idea what to expect. I have to admit, I was a little nervous. It is rare that I will ride without someone present. It is rare that I will ride bareback outside the safety net of an arena. But I felt this overwhelming feeling of trust. It feels strange and I want to argue with it but I just know it's really okay.
Cricket was a little forward and animated in her walk. There were times she was a little argumentative about grazing. But not once did I feel scared. Not once. What I felt was a strong connection with my horse. I felt our partnership.
I think we were out for about 15 minutes. Like I said, nothing earth-shattering. But every minute that we were together, we were together. And that's what this whole journey has been about.